CHICAGO, IL — Area woman known as Teri turned in her two weeks’ notice today after two arduous years of employment. The reason for this sudden action? She’s been offered a new job, during “normal working-people hours.”
“I just couldn’t work third shift anymore,” Teri explained. “Just between you and me, only crazy people work third shift.”
Her new job in the wonderful world of finance begins September 10th, provided she is able to pass both criminal background and credit checks. This paper has it on reliable intel that these checks should indeed go through without a hitch.
“The background check just looks for convictions, so everything will be A-OK,” Teri joked. (We think.)
No word as of yet on the hotel’s response to this employment upheaval, but we will keep you posted on all breaking developments. A counteroffer is expected and will be promptly turned down. For now, Teri is going to celebrate, crazy monkey-style.
“What is that exactly? Do I have to fling poo or something? Maybe I’ll just go out with some friends for pizza.”