Sad News

The pastor who was going to perform my wedding–the pastor whom I have known since I was 10–was fired from the church Sunday due to marital unfaithfulness.  I don’t know all the details [nor do I want to, honestly], but I can’t help but feel horrible for his family.  They were close with my parents, I am friends with his kids and extended family.  It affects a lot of people in the church, and I feel badly for all of them.

Selfishly, I feel badly for myself as well.  Not so much regarding the wedding, because we have time to find another officiant, but because this was a man I respected and trusted.  Due to events from my childhood, trusting [or even just feeling comfortable with] men does not come easy to me.  I hate this mentality that a man that does NOT cheat is an anamoly–it should be the other way around.  I know a lot of women who shrug their shoulders and say, “All men cheat–it’s just how it is.”  That makes me sick to my stomach.

I have a mental list of good male examples.  When I start to become too jaded toward the male gender, I can look to this list and think, “See?  They aren’t all bad.  Here are some men of quality.  Men who won’t let me down.”  The list has taken some hits over the years as the men I know who are honest, faithful, and moral become increasingly few and far between.

Once again, that list is one person shorter.

4 thoughts on “Sad News

  1. I want you to know that I have a similar list. And mine's taken several hits over the years as well. I'll pray with you as you mourn this loss, and as you get back up and find someone else to guide you, someone you can ADD to your list. That's how I get by. I look for reasons to add a person to my list.

    • Thanks for the comment. Does it [or did it] ever make you afraid for you own marriage? Steve is on my list, obviously, but the prevalence of unfaithfulness still frightens me sometimes.

      I guess I'm putting that question out to anyone and everyone: Did you ever worry and how did you get over it?

  2. "I have a mental list of good male examples."

    Honestly, it's hard to find a good list of people in general, regardless of gender. Horrible behavior is everywhere, and it doesn't have a gender. You just have to keep the people you care about close. Nothing is guaranteed in life, but making sure you KNOW the people you have kept close to you is important.

  3. I'll give you the regardless of gender part. But as most of my letdowns and disappointments have been primarily from men, they are what constitute this particular list.

What do you think?