So when I tweeted about cat puke, I expected [and received] the typical “Ew, gross” response, but I also received a lot of empathy. People understood what I was talking about.
The tweet? “One of the greatest life lessons I’ve learned is that cat puke always comes in twos.” It’s true. This morning I woke up and went to get some water only to find that one of the cats had puked on the rug we keep in front of the sink. [Another life lesson would be that the difficulty of cleaning an object is directly proportional to the likelihood that a cat will puke on it.]
Knowing cat puke’s trend to always come in double doses, I stayed where I was and scanned the hardwood floor around the rug. I didn’t see anything. I wondered if perhaps for the first time ever my saying was inaccurate. As I cleaned, I began to question everything I had ever come to believe, pondering whether they too might be invalid. Perhaps the early bird didn’t get the worm, apples didn’t keep away doctors, and stitches in time saved only seven. Who could say for sure?
Finishing my task, I stood up and turned around. Before placing my foot I saw it–el puko numero dos–right where my foot would have gone had I not still been skeptical about seeing only one puke spot. The world made sense once again!